Women are not lesser than men

Mark 16:9 Now when Jesus was risen early the first day of the week, he appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom he had cast seven devils.

This scripture stood out to me in this weeks reading, equality is sometimes a touchy subject but I wanted to look at it anyway.I grew up surrounded by strong confident LDS women, a decade ago when I moved to Utah, I was shocked by how many women deferred to their spouse's opinion when it related to a gospel topic. This cultural phenomenon is simply not scripturally based. Mary Magdalene was the first person Jesus appeared to, she was tasked with telling his disciples. The Savior obviously held women in high esteem. Men and Women's roles are different but equal. I appreciate the priesthood in my life, and my husband appreciates motherhood, the gift I have to bear and raise children to the Lord. Together these are important components of a healthy relationship.  In today's society, we see a pendulum effect of women trying to assert their ‘sameness’ so they gain equality to men. As a feminist I have no issue with the fight to be treated better, sometimes however the how is questionable.

Men and Women are different. We have different roles to fill, our divine destiny and calling are different. If you need more confirmation about how the church talks about our roles read The Family: A Proclamation to the World and then you should read this article on equal partnership in marriage. 

Really I shouldn't have to convince you, you should know this. Our worth is divine, and infinite,  as is the other genders. we are not more or less than each other. we are simply different.

Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me

Matthew 25:40

I have to admit, this weekend is a busy one,  General Conference is this weekend, so that takes up a lot of my day, finals are next week and that takes up even more of my day, so how easy would it be to not help my neighbor who is moving. well..... it was pretty easy actually, I missed the alarm and.... 

Everything you just read is an excuse. Plain and simple.  when we look at the scripture, it is clear, not helping the neighbor move when  I clearly could have is my version of telling the Savior 'there's no room here for you'.

 That might seem a bit drastic but really is it?

Charity is the pure love of Christ, helping others who are less fortunate than us, helping those that simply need our help is our way of showing the Savior we want to do his bidding, we want to make space in our lives, our homes, our hearts for him. Persistently making choices that deny that love of others, shows that we have no room.

A few days ago a classmate complained about homeless people being dirty, stinky and "why don't they just get a job". it is this statement that caused me to reflect on the scripture in Matthew 25:40 "...Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me". As the week has progressed, I again considered these two things. Our judgment about people is also a judgment about the Savior. Michale Mclean in his song wrote: go here

"Homeless, Homeless

Like the Christ child was

Homeless, Homeless

But there is hope because

He came down to earth to lead us

He vowed He'd never leave us

Homeless, Homeless

For in His love there is a home"

go here to listen to a good version.(it's totally a Christmas carol but it's good)

Elder Holland(One of my very favorite conference speakers) in answer to, what can we do? said this in 2014

"For one thing, we can, as King Benjamin taught, cease withholding our means because we see the poor as having brought their misery upon themselves. Perhaps some have created their own difficulties, but don’t the rest of us do exactly the same thing? Isn’t that why this compassionate ruler asks, “Are we not all beggars?”11 Don’t we all cry out for help and hope and answers to prayers? Don’t we all beg for forgiveness for mistakes we have made and troubles we have caused? Don’t we all implore that grace will compensate for our weaknesses, that mercy will triumph over justice at least in our case? "

(full talk here)

I am not better than the Savior, I am not better than a homeless person, our divine worth means the person living on the street is worth the same as I am, and if the Savior of the world was once homeless, who am I to withhold what I can give from another.

doing for others what I can, is just another way I can begin to thank The Savior for what he has done for me.

Prayer

Last night I had a dream, It was a pretty terrifying dream, there was no way we could survive, it was miraculous. It ended with me on my knee's thanking my Father in Heaven for his mercy and love. When I awoke I thanked Him again for allowing me to have this dream, where I could see how much he really loves me and how he can do anything, that it often comes down to us and our faith in what he will or won't do for us.

Yes, this was a dream, but ultimately it put into action what I have been thinking about, Prayer. Sometimes I question answers I get to prayers, is this something I want as an answer or is this the answer I am meant to receive? I imagine this is not an unusual concept to most people. 

Matthew 21:22

And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.

This particular scripture reminded me of several others, In 3 Nephi it adds the concept of asking for what is right. I think this is where most of us fall short when it comes to asking for things, we ask for things we want for ourselves. once we align our will with the will of the Lord it becomes us asking for things He wants for us.

President Faust gave a talk in April 2002 entitled The Lifeline of Prayer, as I have pondered and read about this topic I found what he had to say touching "This morning I bear witness of the importance of prayer. Access to our Creator through our Savior is surely one of the great privileges and blessings of our lives" He also said, "When God placed man on the earth, prayer became the lifeline between mankind and God". Go read or listen to his talk here. It is impactful.

When we talk about Prayer it would be remiss to not mention the Saviors plea to his Father. 

Luke 22: 42
Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.

The Living Christ knew how prayer works. He had faith in his Fathers ability to take the cup away from him, but he acknowledged what was right,  that it was needful that it was in accordance with the Fathers will.

Prayer is simple, but not easy. As we continue to move towards "not my will, but thine" we will move closer to the Savior, and closer to who our Father in Heaven knows we can be.

The Good Samaritan Luke 10:30-37

I’m sure in every generation, in every era, we are always in need of more Good Samaritans, but, since I live in this generation, I can’t help but see how much we still need to look past our differences. We are just as in need of Good Samaritans today as the world ever was. This is not a post about the current American President, and is not meant as any kind of political commentary, I think of the talk given by Elder Kearon, (you can find it here) this was given in April 2016. This talk really affected me and touched many who heard it. You can tell where the thoughts of many of the leaders of the church lie when another person also talks about refugees in the same conference (to the relief society) this talk can be found here. This talk which sparked a website (Iwasastranger.lds.org) was titled I was a stranger, in its Sister Burton even brings up the story of the Good Samaritan. She emphasises Luke 10:37 

...Then said Jesus unto him, Go, and do thou likewise.

If we are to go and do likewise, that is be a good Samaritan, we have to be able to overlook each other’s differences and see our fundamental similarities, we can do this with the clothes we wear, the color of our skin, the tattoos and piercings we have and the religion we practice, or lack of religion. We are a people who have similarities. We can find common ground if we try to.

I am a pacifist, and about as un-nerdy as a person can be. I married a retired soldier for the Army, who is also a big nerd. I’m not sure a nerdy soldier is a common thing, but what I do know is that while our differences are stark, we love and appreciate each other. I am proud of my husband’s service, even if the idea of having a gun in our home makes me very uncomfortable. I enjoy watching my husband’s 6 ft. frame relax as he begins to enjoy playing a video game, or some other complicated game that I can’t follow. Life and Love should never be about how differences divide us, but how differences can enrich our lives, and how similarities can encourage connection.

The story of the Good Samaritan has many messages, one we should see is how the Savior wants us to be. Good, kind, thoughtful, travelling the extra mile, going out of our comfort zone to help another. When we turn others into our enemy because we do not understand them, or they look, talk, or believe differently than we do, we are missing an opportunity. An opportunity to become more like Christ, an opportunity to grow. We need to work on getting past our fears so we can tend to the needs of others. 

Sometimes our enemies are not our enemies

They are a friend we do not know,

They are our neighbor.

Forgiving

Forgiveness is a topic most would rather avoid, but here are some musings from me, an imperfect BYUI student....

We aren't perfect, and most of the time we give ourselves a hard time about this,  but often we give others a hard time because of this too. We do this by not forgiving when we feel people have wronged us in some way.  We read In Doctrine and Covenants 64: 10

" I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men."

It is required, not you should or it is better for you if you do, but it is required. Some offenses don’t take long to forgive, some hardships are easier to get past than others, but we get credit for trying. Sometimes forgiveness will take a lifetime, and sometimes, the original hurt will be triggered by something else entirely causing us to dwell on those feelings again. WHEN these things happen, just keep going, keep trying, it is ok to keep trying, just don't give up.

while I didn't mean to sounds like President Holland, he has many wise words, you can read his talk about giving up here. its one of my favorites. 

I feel very strongly that the person we find hardest to forgive is usually ourselves, our exacting standards that we require of ourselves leave no room for our imperfections.  When things are tough and we need to forgive ourselves we should consider that it is required.   The atonement makes it possible to repent, to forgive and to move on.  In his talk from 2011 Elder C. Scott Grow said 

"If you are suffering from feelings of guilt or remorse, bitterness or anger, or loss of faith, I invite you to seek relief. Repent and forsake your sins. Then, in prayer, ask God for forgiveness. Seek forgiveness from those you have wronged. Forgive those who have wronged you. Forgive yourself"   if you want to read or listen to this talk go here. 

Forgiveness is one of those topics that cause me a lot of angst, in my reading about forgiveness I came across some awesome advice “after completing the forgiveness process, victims may still be haunted on occasion by the pain of the offense. During this stage, it is important to move forward. When thoughts revert to the painful injury, the victim is reminded that the decision to forgive has already been made. He or she does not have to repeat the process” (chapter 20 successful marriage and families).

This along with other readings has really helped me to understand that forgiveness is a process.  and it is ok that I fall down, and it is ok that sometimes forgiveness takes longer than others.

And it is ok. 

I need to keep repenting, keep forgiving, and keep moving forward. 

Together is a wonderful place to start.

Judging

Thhhhhhhhats right, we are going to talk about Judging. This week I read a few cool things,
In Matthew 7 we read
1. Judge not, that ye be not judged.

Don't think I didn't see that eye roll, this is important!

In Luke 6 it says
36. Be ye, therefore, merciful , as your Father also is merciful.

Hands up if you have been judged or if you have judged someone else unfairly.



  It's unanimous we have all been on one or both sides of the judging.



I belong to a divorce support group, let me tell you something you may not have expected to hear...people can be soo judgy about divorce. You might think in a nation with such high rates of divorce, in a religion that preaches love and forgiveness and to NOT JUDGE, we would as a community be nicer, turns out we aren't. Some of the things divorced people are judged unfairly and often without any evidence about include but are not limited to the following:
-  stealing your spouse because we are now desperate for someone else's spouse now that we have finally  thrown ours away
- being abusive (if you are male)
- being a woman scorned (and therefore out for blood)
- being greedy (if you get alimony or child support)
- having an issue with porn (usually men are accused of this)
- infidelity
The list is endless, you may know someone who faces this reality. I have heard some of these in relation to me, I am now married ladies so thankfully your husbands are safe again.  You may know someone who has these very issues. And yet... im sure you can find the scripture about sweeping your own back door or scripturally put, worrying about the beam that is in your eye and not the mote(splinter) in your neighbors eye. (Matthew 7:3-5)
instead  of judging, BE MERCIFUL as the scriptures say or as  President Uchtodorf says:

Matthew 5:48 says
Be ye therefore perfect, even as your father which is in heaven is perfect
let's quickly compare that to Luke 6:36
Be ye therefore merciful , as your Father also is merciful.

This week I used a technique in my reading called Flag Phrases. flag phrases are there to alert us to something important. Well, friends, I see something important here.
Be ye therefore... perfect/merciful even as your Father is.

In our journey towards perfection perhaps we should spend a leeeeetle more time in trying to be merciful to each other.
Just because you don't understand is not a reason to dislike.
 Being Judged unfairly hurts  and not just the person being judged, It hurts the person judging too.  You have felt it, I have felt it. so let's stop perpetuating that hurt on others.

The profound poster above, is made from words in this talk, you should watch it. its pretty amazing
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/the-merciful-obtain-mercy?lang=eng

Fasting

Sometimes I think we have a lot of commandments, most of the time I just try to live worthily and do my best. And then I read something in the scriptures which makes me consider how I have been obeying a particular commandment. When you know better you do better right?- Ok so being Human this is not always the case, BUT when you know better and you don't do anything, I kinda sorta feel that I'm going to have to answer MORE for my behavior than I did before I realized it was a big thing.

So I don't often think about fasting, it’s one of those commandments that I should do, but never really thought of as a commandment before.

Then I was reading for my religion class using a technique called cause and effect, essentially looking for IF, THEN principles. So the IF, THEN   doesn't really apply here, but I thought it was interesting that it was in using a technique that I started looking closer at scriptures we read at least once a year...right? The scripture I'm referring to starts around Matthew 3:15 the Savior says “it becometh us to fulfill all righteousness”, Of course here he is talking about being baptized but right after his baptism what does he do? He fasts for forty days. This started me thinking. If the savior a perfect person, needed to be BAPTISED to fulfill all righteousness, why did he fast? Was it for the same reason? Then I came across this scripture, Doctrine and Covenants 88.76 “I give unto you a commandment that ye shall continue in prayer and fasting from this time forth.” 

Wait what? I have been a member my whole life and never really SAW that fasting was a commandment.

- Clear tangent here but we can also read in John 1:5, And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.  I was totally in the dark, possibly by choosing not to see this as a commandment? Interesting concept. Should I be repenting for not obeying this commandment, or just doing better?

Back to Fasting, what are the benefits of fasting, let’s just acknowledge that fasting is a commandment and I should be doing it, monthly. Not for forty days, but for twenty-four hours. I might start small and work up to 24 hours even. I ate an hour ago and already I’m looking for something to munch on. Maybe I’m just being an unfaithful servant? But seriously if your kids are just starting to fast don’t make them do a whole 24 hours, kids are mean when they are hungry.

 The benefits of fasting. There must be some, for a start, this is what the Savior did before he started his ministry so there must be some spiritual benefit to fasting.

Elder L. Tom Perry said there is "humility and spiritual strength derived from fasting" you can read or listen his talk here, it’s really good

 https://www.lds.org/general-conference/1986/04/the-law-of-the-fast?lang=eng.

Like most (read all) commandments there is surely not just one reason to live this commandment, At the very least there is obeying the commandment to be obedient, then add to that physical health, helping the hungry (through fast offerings which is kinda the same topic but I'm not talking about it here) and drawing near to the spirit. 

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin said: “Without prayer, fasting is not complete fasting; it’s simply going hungry. If we want our fasting to be more than just going without eating, we must lift our hearts, our minds, and our voices in communion with our Heavenly Father. Fasting, coupled with mighty prayer, is powerful. It can fill our minds with the revelations of the Spirit. It can strengthen us against times of temptation” You can also read or listen to his talk here:
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2001/04/the-law-of-the-fast?lang=eng

It’s another good one. It helps add dimension to fasting, fasting is not just going hungry. It is more than that.

The savior fasted for forty days we can manage it for one. Food for thought.